3 Stages of Narcissism Evolution

An initial state of well-being and satisfaction in which ALL of the infants' NEEDs are ought to be gratified and the infant feels an oceanic perfection and bliss, which is disturbed by Unavoidable Delays and Shortcomings of the Mother's care.

A primitive view of oneself as Great that needs to be MIRRORED; this condition is expressed in Unrealistic Exhibitionism resulting from Mother as the Object role NOT play 'Reflecting, echoing, approving and confirming' to fulfill infant's Primary self-object experience: Infants feeling 'Mirror' needs are gratified, which optimally leads to HEALTHY transmuting internalization of primitive narcissism.

① Empathy given by Parents:

The ability to assume the perspective of another person, to know and understand his or her experiences

② Optimal Frustration: GRADUAL Frustration

An ideal, non-traumatic frustration of a person's needs that fosters New Learning and Personal Growth. Parents who are too Strict OR too Lenient with their children adversely affect their development by not supplying with Progressive Frustration.

③ Transmuting Internalization

The process whereby individuals learn more Realistic and Effective ways of thinking, feeling and behaving as a consequence of interactions with Empathic parents, ideally the evolution progression works as below:

Grandiose Wish during infancy ----> 'gently frustrating'---（If Success) ---> as Initiator of Actions/Competency ----(Once Failure)---> 'Overwhelming Or Lacking Frustration'----BOTH results in--->Primary Narcissism FIXATED ON Grandiose Self Afterwards and Reinforced as aging, manifesting in 'Pursuit of Perfectionism, High demanding of Mirroring, Over-reacting of being criticized or teased, Unrealistic Exhibitionism' IN DISGUISE OF subconscious LOW SELF-ESTEEM OR unconscious Blind OVER SELF-ESTEEM

Children's Initial image of their parents as 'Mighty &Perfect' -----as 'All-knowing and All powerful’

Optimal Frustration: Realistic Imperfections and Limitations of the Idealized Parent Imago

--->Healthy Parent is one who is 'optimally failing ':

1. Succeed to Empathize 'New learning process' ---> Realistically thro learning & progress, transmuting 'the sense of frustration from idealized object' into Internalization of 'Inner DRIVE':                                      Optimal Mental Health: Cohesive Self Structure => NUCLEAR SELF（2-3 y-o of life）forms a Personality that is organized and resistant to fragmentation(narcissism &perfect fantasy), which is healthy and Functions effectively, because its primitive narcissistic energies are primarily invested in the pursuit of REALISTIC GOALS for sake of Self-Realization while the Unrealizable ones will be ACCEPTed via brain rationalization, by mental noting them as part of  'Self-Actualization' for LOSS&GAIN-balanced state of mind.                                                                                                                                  
2. Parents who Fail to Empathize 'idealized parent imago' led kids to remain FIXATING ON Primitive and Largely Unrealistic SPLIT Self into Bipolar Structure: Two Poles namely 'GRANDIOSE SELF' and 'IDEALIZING（idealized parent imago）SELF'. In often cases that even parents thyselves are ignorant of their own same Narcissism and perform Unrealistic ego-Exhibitionism& convince their children how great perfect they are, over time children's BINARY Thinking Paradigms will be HARD WIRED to firmly believe 'its TRUTHFULNESS' and therefore further introjecting: NOT Accepting Imperfection and Limitation of External people and the World----turns out Maladaptive Beliefs of 'Ecstasy, Superiority, Superexellence, Special, Eager to change others & the world' when it comes to a GAIN, yet under conditions of big LOSS in reality, of 'complaining loss/unfairness, overwhelmingly frustrated/disappointment' which can deprive one's TRUST over others and things, Demotivate one's interest&faith to life goals& purpose, in an iterativeover loop adversely cause brain 'Reward System Failure',  as a final consequence of depression even suicidal, antisocial borderline personalities & behaviors